Give Until It Hurts (?)

- July 08, 2023

Give Until It Hurts (?)

(July 8, 2023)

“Give until it hurts.” A popular dictum referring to the act of giving without counting the cost…until it hurts. I placed a question mark (?) at the end of the title of this article on purpose. I want to reflect on this dictum a little bit more.

There are different types of “giving.” Most common is the act where something tangible is handed out to another. Another act of giving is focus on being available to someone in need. Here, a person gives time and presence more than anything else.

A deeper kind of giving is that in which you give practically everything that you are to another person in whatever way possible towards the betterment of that person. An act of deep generosity and kindness. An act of unconditional love.

Simply put, giving can be categorized as any of the following:

· Material Giving: Offering tangible resources to those in need, such as money, food, clothing, or shelter.

· Time and Service Giving: Giving our time and service to others.

· Emotional and Compassionate Giving: Giving from the heart, such as through empathy and compassion.

· Spiritual Giving: Giving through faith and spirituality.

· Generosity of Presence: Giving our presence and attention to others.

· Environmental Giving: Giving to protect the environment.

· Creative Giving: Giving through art, music, or other creative means.

· Random Acts of Kindness: Giving through small, unexpected acts of kindness

It is unfortunate though that some people misunderstood the reason why we give. They question our motive and intention. They give “color” to a simple act of kindness. Pure our intentions though maybe, we sometimes feel how frustrating it is to be misunderstood.

To some, it did not matter. The giving continues.

To others though, it was downright disappointing to be unappreciated, and worse, to be misunderstood. Thus, the giver refrains from giving.

Whatever the response of the giver to possible criticisms or responses, good or bad, no one can judge the giver’s intention because nobody knows exactly what is in the heart of the giver.

As a receiver, if you are happy for the gift, be grateful and appreciate the giver.

If you doubt the intention of the giver, don’t accept the gift, and politely refuse.

The blessing over the act of giving is not meant only for the giver but also for the recipient moreover. To receive an act of love is an awesome grace, a blessing that will hopefully overflow and turn the receiver into a giver at the proper time. The cycle of giving revolves and evolves into a cycle of love and harmony among persons.

At this point, I am reminded of the Prayer of Generosity of St. Ignatius of Loyola:

Dearest Lord,
teach me to be generous;
teach me to serve You as You deserve;
to give and not to count the cost,
to fight and not to heed the wounds,
to toil and not to seek for rest,
to labour and not to ask for reward
save that of knowing I am doing Your Will.

My deepest belief: When I give, I also give a part of myself. Cherish my gift, you cherish my memory. Value my gift, you value the offer of myself. Use my gift, you give meaning to that moment in time when I was a part of your life.

Each of you should give what you have decided in your heart to give, not reluctantly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver. (2 Corinthians 9:7)

But who am I, and who are my people, that we should be able to give as generously as this? Everything comes from you, and we have given you only what comes from your hand. (1 Chronicles 29:14)

A gift opens the way
and ushers the giver into the presence of the great. (Proverbs 18:16)

A generous person will prosper;
whoever refreshes others will be refreshed. (Proverbs 11:25)

Give, and it will be given to you. A good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over, will be poured into your lap. For with the measure you use, it will be measured to you. (Luke 6:38)

You will be enriched in every way so that you can be generous on every occasion, and through us your generosity will result in thanksgiving to God. (2 Corinthians 9:11)

And God is able to bless you abundantly, so that in all things at all times, having all that you need, you will abound in every good work. (2 Corinthians 9:8)

But when you give to the needy, do not let your left hand know what your right hand is doing, so that your giving may be in secret. Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you. (Matthew 6:3-4)

To give is to respond to God’s call to love.